"No, it's your father. Really."

Things you don't want to hear at 5:10am:

#2: "Mommy"

[pauses to poke me in the eye a couple times to make sure that I'm awake]  

#2: "Moooooooommmmmmmyyyyyyy......"

Me: "*snarf* ~gurgle~ ^snort^ Ehh..whasshappening whatimeisit gotobed.. *groan"

#2: [stage whisper] "Mommy, I hear Santa downstairs at the door!"

[I listen, hear DH getting ready for his Aikido class.]

Me: "That's your father getting ready to leave. Go back to bed."

[At this point a 45 minute argument ensues about whether the noises are Santa or his father, by which time I am so awake that my brain hurts, I feel hungover without the knowledge that I at least had a rocking time the night before, and I'm desperately wishing that my four year old was as skeptical about stuff as his older brother.]