Hi.

Welcome to my place.

I write about about being a 40-something mum of five wonderfully exasperating children, attachment parenting, my adventures in the kitchen, and whatever else comes to mind. 

-Melissa.

Surrealism 101

Every now and then I have a truely funny conversation with my boys on the walk home from school. Today was just a single drop in the experiential water bucket of my kids' stream of consciousness:

#1: (while running and taking flying leaps over sidewalk cracks) "I am Amazing Jumping Man! I jump over sidewalk cracks to make myself super strong!"

#2: "I jump too! I strong too! Jump, jump, juuuuuummmmmmp!"

He jumps over a crack while gripping my hand, causing me to stumble.

#1: "Careful, Mommy! You don't want to fall into the street and knock your head off! If you did that then you'd be dead!"

Me: "Yes, being dead would really suck, wouldn't it? I wouldn't be able to listen to my music, or bake things, or sit on the step and watch you play."

#1 interrupts--

#1: "Or eat chocolate or poutine, or read me stories!"

#2: "Or thnuggle on da couch, or jump, or play wid Heaver.."

#2 clearly runs out of ideas at this point.

Me: "Yup, if I was dead I wouldn't get to do any of that. And I wouldn't get to hang out with my favorite boys, either!"

#1: "But it's okay to pretend to be dead.. I'd rather be Spiderman, though--then I could shoot webs." #1 demonstrates his webshooting prowess. "I'm going to swing home on my webs, Mom."

#1 proceeds to enact a sequence of webshooting and swinging the rest of the way home.

#2: "I be Aquaman, Mommy. Popo be Batman and Heaver dohing ta be Robin."

Me: "What about me? Who do I get to be?"

#2: (thinks for a moment) "You be da Thpace Monkey, Mommy."

How appropriate. ;)

Body Farm

Cuddy's Anatomy